Feminism will be intersectional

versatilequeen:

• when men follow me down the street, slowing down as I slow down, and  speeding up as I speed up, just so they can keep walking behind me.
• when they think they should be able to take pictures of me without my knowledge, and post them online in subreddits meant as masturbation hubs.
• anytime they call me a bitch, cunt, whore, etc…
• when they only care about their own orgasm.
• when they drunkenly throw beer cans at me on college campuses and yell “slut” at me.
• when they thought it was ironically funny to call me a slut in front of my friend’s parents when I was still a virgin at 18, and they knew it.
• when they grab my ass without asking.
• when they hug me extra long and tight to smash my boobs into them.
• when they tell me I can’t get an abortion.
• when they tell me I have to get an abortion.
• when they ask to see the tattoo on my lower back every. single. time. we hang out.
• when they threaten violence towards me, even jokingly.
• when they shove their fingers in my vagina without permission.
• when they grope my chest without permission when I fall asleep on their couch.
• when they stand close enough to me in the elevator that I can feel their erections.
• when they ask me “where I am from” because my dark, curly hair “must be from being mixed with something.”
• when they insist that I must be hiding my ethnicity (“are you sure you’re not mixed?”) when I tell them I am white, because they get off on the idea of me being ~exotic~.
• when they say calorie counting is annoying and petty, while also expecting me not to gain weight.
• when I literally have to say - “You realize I am actually smart - stop ignoring me,” before they will even look in my direction.
• when they have lots of tattoos, but hate on my “tramp stamp.”
• when they talk on and on about how disgusting and ugly vaginas are.
• when they make sure I am not on my period before taking my emotions seriously.
• when they assume I know nothing about computers, sports, business, or guns.

For the record, I wouldn’t like it if women did these things either, but, strangely enough, they don’t.

Imagine that.

(via catharticintentions)

nejihina:

feminist77:

nejihina:

feminist77:

nejihina:

Just because a man asks you to have sex with him, doesn’t mean he is a misogynist.

Just because a man tells you you are a bitch/cunt/etc. doesn’t mean he is a misogynist

Just because a man disagrees with what you say, doesn’t mean he is a misogynist.

Just because a man says that there are times…

Hahahaha omg.

If a man calls a woman a “cunt” or a “bitch,” that DOES make him a misogynist.  ”Cunt” and “bitch” are derogatory terms said to women to keep them in their place.  Yes you could retaliate by calling a man a cunt or a bitch, but then the words take on a completely different meaning.  A man who is called a “bitch” is seen as less than other men because of the feminine connotation of the word.  It’s actually pretty interesting when you think about it… a female “bitch” is too assertive and outspoken, while a male “bitch” is too submissive.  Ah the rigidity of the gender binary.  

I digress.  OP, misandry is not real, so please fuck off.

I have actually never really seen the logic behind the “feminize a man and he is worth less” argument that you “feminists” are so incredibly fond of.

While I agree that if you look in movies, there are stronger boys calling weaker men “their bitches”, but why do you as a woman (I am assuming you are one) take offence to one man being another ones “bitch”?

You must try and figure out that one on your own, but I digress with your “misandry isn’t real” argument. Sure thing, you may not outright hate men, but the right dictionary for both misandry and misogyny are more or less the same:

Misandry: Hatred of men

Misogyny: Hatred of women

These two here do not have to be cultural, international or or even national to exist. Women have been the subjective part of society for as long as we can remember, but does that really mean that men have always hated women, that women have been the most hated gender throughout the history of ever? Are you saying that during the old times there was never ever a single husband who loved his wife and saw her more that just a object?

Whoa.  Way to put words in my mouth.  Never have I said that all men are evil, or that they aren’t good people, or that they “hate” women.  This isn’t about whether or not men “like” me, I could give a flying fuck about that.  

I take offense to a man calling another man his “bitch” because “bitch” has a feminine connotation.  Thus the subtext is that people who are feminine (i.e. women) are bad and weak.  And this message is implicit in every facet of our lives - in the media, in the workplace, in politics, etc.     

Quote the dictionary definition of misandry all you want.  Misandry isn’t real because if women discriminate against men, it has no real bearing on men’s lives.  Sure, maybe it hurts their feelings.  But generally, men laugh it off and call the women in question a feminazi.  On the other hand, if a man says something discriminatory towards women - “girls are so catty” etc. - so many people, men and women alike, will agree with him.  Misogyny is widespread and common, whereas misandry is not.

But more importantly, the worst thing that misandry can do is hurt a man’s feelings.  Misogyny, on the other hand, is historically responsible for the wage gap, for  widespread sexual violence and abuse against women, and for women who spend their entire lives hating their bodies or other aspects of themselves because since childhood they have received the message that even if they are smart, funny, and accomplished, it means jack shit to anyone unless they also fit into society’s traditional notion of beauty.  Misandry isn’t real because men are in power.  Misogyny is real because women are (and have always been) marginalized.  End of story.    

The only feminine that is about the word “bitch” is that it is a female dog. If you bring forth the argument that it dehumanizes women, then use it all you like.

It can wary from man to man how he will react. Some men will, as you said, laugh it off and call you a feminazi and, as you said, some people will agree with him. But I personally think that it is good when people call out on someone and tell them that what they said is off colour or offensive and they will not tolerate it. And then there are those men who will actually believe you and they will treat themselves as misogynistic scum. Have you ever considered that men can have insecurities too? Has the thought that at least one man has looked on the internet or a magazine and seen a man who has big muscles and a stunning six-pack and then this man has lost some of his self esteem and begun to hate his own body, ever occurred to you?

And if you really think about about it, men have always done all the work. It was their job to do well in school, get a proper job and bring money and food home to the wife whose only job was to take care of the house and take care of the children. If a woman could not make food or properly keep the house, it was the man’s fault.

I know it may sound like I am glorifying men now, but it is not men as a whole how have always had control.

If you look at history, you’ll find that it was always the “rich have power and the poor don’t”, rather than “men have power and women don’t”.

Yeah the problem with that last point is that in most cultures for most of history, men were in control of money and property, while women’s only way to money and property was through marriage.  And anyway, this is not an ‘either or issue.’  Rich, white men always have and continue to be in power because of their race, gender and class.

Also, I’d like to address this statement you’ve made:

“wife whose only job was to take care of the house and take care of the children.”

Have you ever been responsible for children or the brunt of the housework?  I spent a year in AmeriCorps helping to run a household where 7 teenage girls lived.  I did things like cook dinner for 10 people, drive the girls to and from school and soccer and volleyball practice, sat with them while they did their homework, washed dishes, checked chores, swept floors, cleaned countertops, did yardwork, and enforced discipline and diffused fights between the girls.  And that’s not even half the shit the other houseparents had to do to keep the house running.  At the end of each day I was exhausted, and no one really appreciated anything I’d done, just like I never appreciated how hard my mom worked when I was younger.  It’s not that women have never worked hard, it’s that no one sees the work women do as valuable.  Partly this is because ‘if a woman can do it anyone can,’ and partly it’s capitalism - in a capitalistic society everything comes down to money, so work that doesn’t pay is considered worthless.

In any case, many women do work outside the home now.  And guess what?  The majority of them still do most of the housework, even if they are the breadwinner of the house.  Think about your family and your friends’ families.  How many of their dads take primary responsibility for cooking and cleaning the house?  Even if they do help out a lot, their wives or female partners tell them what to do and how and when to do it, right?  That doesn’t mean the men are purposefully or consciously being unhelpful… it’s just the way it is.  Because patriarchy.  

Finally, I would like to re-state that never once have I said that all men are bad or ignorant or whatever else.  I don’t care whether or not men ‘believe’ that patriarchal white supremacy exists… IT DOES, regardless of how ‘enlightened’ men are.

nejihina:

feminist77:

nejihina:

Just because a man asks you to have sex with him, doesn’t mean he is a misogynist.

Just because a man tells you you are a bitch/cunt/etc. doesn’t mean he is a misogynist

Just because a man disagrees with what you say, doesn’t mean he is a misogynist.

Just because a man says that there are times…

Hahahaha omg.

If a man calls a woman a “cunt” or a “bitch,” that DOES make him a misogynist.  ”Cunt” and “bitch” are derogatory terms said to women to keep them in their place.  Yes you could retaliate by calling a man a cunt or a bitch, but then the words take on a completely different meaning.  A man who is called a “bitch” is seen as less than other men because of the feminine connotation of the word.  It’s actually pretty interesting when you think about it… a female “bitch” is too assertive and outspoken, while a male “bitch” is too submissive.  Ah the rigidity of the gender binary.  

I digress.  OP, misandry is not real, so please fuck off.

I have actually never really seen the logic behind the “feminize a man and he is worth less” argument that you “feminists” are so incredibly fond of.

While I agree that if you look in movies, there are stronger boys calling weaker men “their bitches”, but why do you as a woman (I am assuming you are one) take offence to one man being another ones “bitch”?

You must try and figure out that one on your own, but I digress with your “misandry isn’t real” argument. Sure thing, you may not outright hate men, but the right dictionary for both misandry and misogyny are more or less the same:

Misandry: Hatred of men

Misogyny: Hatred of women

These two here do not have to be cultural, international or or even national to exist. Women have been the subjective part of society for as long as we can remember, but does that really mean that men have always hated women, that women have been the most hated gender throughout the history of ever? Are you saying that during the old times there was never ever a single husband who loved his wife and saw her more that just a object?

Whoa.  Way to put words in my mouth.  Never have I said that all men are evil, or that they aren’t good people, or that they “hate” women.  This isn’t about whether or not men “like” me, I could give a flying fuck about that.  

I take offense to a man calling another man his “bitch” because “bitch” has a feminine connotation.  Thus the subtext is that people who are feminine (i.e. women) are bad and weak.  And this message is implicit in every facet of our lives - in the media, in the workplace, in politics, etc.     

Quote the dictionary definition of misandry all you want.  Misandry isn’t real because if women discriminate against men, it has no real bearing on men’s lives.  Sure, maybe it hurts their feelings.  But generally, men laugh it off and call the women in question a feminazi.  On the other hand, if a man says something discriminatory towards women - “girls are so catty” etc. - so many people, men and women alike, will agree with him.  Misogyny is widespread and common, whereas misandry is not.

But more importantly, the worst thing that misandry can do is hurt a man’s feelings.  Misogyny, on the other hand, is historically responsible for the wage gap, for  widespread sexual violence and abuse against women, and for women who spend their entire lives hating their bodies or other aspects of themselves because since childhood they have received the message that even if they are smart, funny, and accomplished, it means jack shit to anyone unless they also fit into society’s traditional notion of beauty.  Misandry isn’t real because men are in power.  Misogyny is real because women are (and have always been) marginalized.  End of story.    

nejihina:

Just because a man asks you to have sex with him, doesn’t mean he is a misogynist.

Just because a man tells you you are a bitch/cunt/etc. doesn’t mean he is a misogynist

Just because a man disagrees with what you say, doesn’t mean he is a misogynist.

Just because a man says that there are times…

Hahahaha omg.

If a man calls a woman a “cunt” or a “bitch,” that DOES make him a misogynist.  ”Cunt” and “bitch” are derogatory terms said to women to keep them in their place.  Yes you could retaliate by calling a man a cunt or a bitch, but then the words take on a completely different meaning.  A man who is called a “bitch” is seen as less than other men because of the feminine connotation of the word.  It’s actually pretty interesting when you think about it… a female “bitch” is too assertive and outspoken, while a male “bitch” is too submissive.  Ah the rigidity of the gender binary.  

I digress.  OP, misandry is not real, so please fuck off.

khaleesi:

bigfatfeminist:

Originally this was written as a response to a single inbox message, and then I got a couple more of them, and now it’s a letter to all of you. I am tired of you.

[TRIGGER WARNING: Rape, rape culture; eating disorders]

It must be exhausting carrying all this hate around, huh? You’re right! It is fucking exhausting! And if it makes me seem like a cranky, miserable bitch, then more power to me.

Do you know why I do it, though? You don’t really deserve an explanation, but I’m going to tell you anyway.

I do it because women’s bodies are sold and used to sell products and somehow this has become one and the same. Because a woman’s accomplishments will never be as important as her appearance in this society as it stands now. Because 65% of girls and women have reported eating disorders.

Because so many, many people — most of them men — tell me I am overreacting or hysterical or a cranky, miserable bitch when I talk about sexism. 

Because if I had a dime for every time some privileged, pompous ass doesn’t listen to me or tells me I’m wrong for no reason, really, just because he has a thing for Scarlett Johansson’s hair and doesn’t want to think about the fact that hey, maybe women are represented badly in the media, I could probably pay my rent for a year.

Because men feel entitled to tell me their opinions on women and entitled to be skeptical of my opinions on women as if I am not better able to comment, as if men are considered the experts on absolutely everything — oh wait, because the entire fucking news media thinks that they are.

Because I live in a world where I spend way too much of my time calculating the possibility that I will be assaulted. I do not know any woman who doesn’t do this. I do not know any woman who doesn’t constantly consider and reconsider the risk of her activities, even if she doesn’t do it consciously, even if she no longer thinks twice about going to the grocery store by herself — if she does it late at night, you can bet there’s a part of her that’s thinking it.

Because I live in a world where I have been told since I was single-digits young that men can hurt me. I live in a world where one out of six of my peers will be raped or sexually assaulted in her lifetime, and 54% of those assaults will go unreported, and 97% of those rapists will walk free. I live in a world where nine out of ten reported rape victims are female-bodied and the vast majority of rapists are men. I live in a world where 2/3rds of the women who are raped are raped by people they know and trust. This is the world I live in. This is a world you don’t even have to think about. This is a world that allows you to feel entitled to tell me my opinions don’t matter to you because they were presented in a way that didn’t cater to your ego, and call me a “cranky, miserable bitch” in the meantime as if you have any idea of whether or not I am actually either of those things. 

So no, I do not need to be polite about your “counter-points.” I do not need to say “Ah, yes, good point,” when you’re not making a good point at all. You are not unique. You have said to me what literally hundreds of other men have said to me before.

And I don’t need to listen to your bullshit, or anyone else’s bullshit. Ever.

Because men feel entitled to tell me their opinions on women and entitled to be skeptical of my opinions on women as if I am not better able to comment, as if men are considered the experts on absolutely everything — oh wait, because the entire fucking news media thinks that they are.

^^^^^

THIS.
And not just the entire fucking news media.  The entire fucking world.

(via in-her-hips-theres-revolution-d)